Actually, Virginia, Hell is Meted Out in Bruises

If you sin, you get bruises. Not eternal damnation by any means, just bruises. I know, I have lots of bruises. I really don't mind them so much. Could be worse... could be that I didn't get to do all those things that leave me with bruises... that would be really sad.

I'm very tired, but I can't sleep. And my hands hurt so I won't knit. Since knitting day is... well, technically today. And I have so much pretty new yarn it's ridiculous. Pretty pretty yarn all over the fucking house...

Well, I did it. I finally finished the lapghan. I bet that's not what you were expecting me to say. But that's what I did. And a scarf. In three different stitches (I get bored easily). And I translated the scroll scarf pattern that I'm making for my aunt into a chart because I like charts better... especially since I have to read every other line backwards since I knit funny. and I'm finally embroidering beads on the little pink purse I knitted for no apparent reason. I feel good about finishing the lapghan. It's the single largest piece I've ever knitted and damn if it wasn't hard to get all the way through with a single two-line repeat. It got so boring after a while... if I never knit that stitch again, I'll be quite fine. I mean, there are only two things to do and they're only three stitches long. Repeat one set of three stitches all the way across, then the other set of three stitches all the way back... then do it again in the other color, then do it again in the first color...etcetera...

My british houseguest Lucinda was great. A really nice lady I plan to keep in touch with. We didn't get to spend a lot of time together. She does crazy things like sleep at night. But we did get to talk some and that was great. She was fun to talk to and I like her a lot. She has moved on to another house here in New Orleans now, but I will see her tomorrow. We're getting together for coffee before she leaves.

Lloyd is in Portland now. (yes, remember, it's Lloyd, Matt and Dennis) He came over Tuesday, met Lucinda, was perfectly charming and spent the night. I will not go into detail, but we had a very good morning, repeatedly. Perhaps a little too good for having company in the living room. Sorry, Luc. His best friend died of flesh-eating strep last week and his other friends all banded together to fly him home for the funeral. He's looking forward to seeing all his friends and trying to put on a brave face about losing a good friend. He has needed a fair bit of attention and distraction over the last week and I've gladly provided both. I remember all too well how hard it is to lose the family members one has chosen instead of having been provided with. We all have two families: the one we got when we were born, no options there; and the one we've hand-picked over the years from all the people we've met... and in most of our cases, the latter is more precious. He left yesterday and will be back on Wednesday. Hopefully seeing his friends and having some comraderie in his grief will have helped a little. I expect that he'll be here by Thursday night.

I'm working incessantly on this little story of mine... it's about an unfaithful minister's wife who doesn't entirely understand why she feels compelled to stray. Something has to give, and of course, it does. It's working its way along nicely and should come to an end one day... just not necessarily any day soon... or within the confines of the tiny orange notebook I started writing it in. It really is a tiny notebook and I'm quickly running out of room, but not story. And then there's the fact that the story is moving very slowly. I'm trying to convey mood without describing it. It's working, but it's slow. There is a slow turning of the wheels of her mind towards an inevitable conclusion, and thus there is a slow turning of the story's wheels towards that conclusion. I'm also trying to tell a lot about the characters by the little things... the husband drinks a ridiculous amount of orange juice and her mother in law thinks she's too pretty... I have managed, very delicately, not to name her... not even after 70 little tiny pages. And, she has managed, in the course of the stories two days, not to speak to her husband, without seeming angry or distant or aloof. It is a tightrope but I want to see how long I can walk it. Right now, however, I'm too tired to write it. And simply not inspired to do so as I'm really having a hard time deciding on this inevitable conclusion. I think I'm simply in too good a mood to write a sad story... and this is largely a sad story.

Yes, yes, I am in a good mood for the reason you think I am. Yes, yes I was at Dennis' house last night. Yes we did go four rounds and it was fucking awesome. Or perhaps I've got those last two words backwards... The nice thing about dating younger men is that two of those rounds were back-to-back... wow. Haven't done that in a LONG time. Older men can't do it. Simply can't. He can and did. Ok, I know that's too much detail, but I'm very very happy about it. Took me almost an hour to wobble my way home... less than a mile. I am mad about him, we all know it. Thank God I have distractions or I would go completely nuts over him.

So... I finally booked my ticket to Melissa's house for next month, set in stone and paid for. I'm going and I'm coming back with cheese. That's final. And Chad and I are set to go sky-diving next weekend (scary!!). Remind me to make sure he has a car or we're not going at all. I think he does, but I'm not sure. The sky-diving place is, of course, way out in the boonies and we need a car to get there. And I'll call them this week and make a reservation or whatever it is you do when you want to go sky-diving that Sunday. Gibson has decided that I need kneading. He loves me. He's purring his little furry heart out and claiming me for himself for the night. He does this by sitting on me so I can't see the keyboard. Fortunately, my high-school typing instructor taught me not to look at the keyboard, so I can still type. So, sky-diving, Melissa's house, then tattoo, then Jeanna comes to town, then leaving.... Busy, busy, busy.... in there somewhere is knitting a lot of charity scarves, visiting Aunt Flossie in Tennessee and various other adventures. And of course the boys.... always boys.

Lloyd will leave town when he gets tired of it, or when someone breaks his heart. Matt is going back to school this week and is still a brat about time for me. Dennis is already saving up to move to Seattle in November. I like Seattle, just not enough to follow him 3000 miles in the wrong direction. Don't get me wrong, I like him too... we all know that. But we also know that if I follow him, I will regret it... we both will. My track record is absolute on that matter. Hahaha... I stole the cat toes. MINE!

Ok, I think it's almost bedtime. I'm hungry too. (the stomach says "roar"). Oh, and Jodi and Steve didn't work out. Oh, well. That's life. He hasn't called me or anything. I heard it from Jodi a week later. I think I'll leave it at that. Good night!

You have no lag time today. Lucky you!